This weekend I celebrated my 35th birthday. Ten years ago, I thought at 35 I would have the husband and at least one kid but that is not the case. I have taken the creative journey and so instead of what I envisioned ten years ago I celebrate this birthday with the publication of my first creative piece. Although I'm 'in like' with someone I have yet to meet the man I want to call my husband and that is OK.
So, I am excited about what my 35th year will bring!
Usually hearing Donna Summer makes me think of my Uncle Glenn but this particular song brings me back to the summer of 1986. The summer my sister Dela and I were OBSESSED with Days of Our Lives. Patch and Kayla were the hot new couple and each weekday was planned around making sure we were in front of a television at 1PM EST to watch what new shenanigans were going on in Salem. That was also the summer I got boobs. Previous summers were spent going to Dunn Park for the free lunches and playing outside until we were dead-tired and staying at my grandma’s until my mom came home from work.
This summer Dela and I were assigned chores. We were old enough (and tall enough) to cook dinner, do laundry, and watch our younger siblings DW (Daniel) and Lelia. Taking them to the park every day and trying to get them back home before Days came on was a chore. But some how we managed to do it.
For awhile my mother thought that my sister and I were not able to tell that difference between what happens on TV to what my sister put it ‘Mommy we know its fake. Roman died and came back from the dead that doesn’t happen in real life.’ (Although I do find it interesting that ten years later Days repeat the Roman Brady/John Black/ Roman is not dead storyline. Now Roman is played by an actor that used to be Kayla, Roman’s sister’s, ex-boyfriend).
Even at nine and ten, we knew that real romance never unfolded the way the budding romance of Steve and Kayla. Not to say that we didn’t fantasize about what our first kiss would be like. We would imitate the soap stars by kissing the backs of our hands. One time my grandmother walked in our little ritual. At first we thought we were in trouble but she just smiled and later on relayed the story our mom who laughed out loud.
Now that I am older this song takes on a different meaning. At thirty-four, I now realize what Donna was singing about its been two years since I’ve had a boyfriend an year since my last sexual encounter was so perfect. Days before I received the news that one of my mentors had passed away she had just turned forty and I was still dealing with the death of my Uncle Adrian (who was five years older than me). The night of that encounter if only for a few moments took all that pain away. Every kiss, touch reminded me that I was a beautiful desirable woman. The sex was good but what really made it memorable was for the first time in a long time someone wanted to take care of me, make me feel good and let me know verbally and physically how much he ‘appreciated’ me.
